


Awakening

by EllieCarina



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi - Fandom
Genre: DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE SPOILED, F/M, Force Bond, Spoiler fic, will be much smuttier in part two
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2017-12-14
Packaged: 2019-02-14 19:19:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13014423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EllieCarina/pseuds/EllieCarina
Summary: Canon-compliant, post TLJ, Rey and Kylo trying to seduce each other to their respective side, force bond-style.Picks up right after the movie ends.





	Awakening

It takes three times appearing to each other after Crait until they speak again. The first time goes over much like that last moment when he knelt before her as she punched the Falcon door closed in his face. They see each other–Rey appearing on the Finalizer’s bridge and Kylo in a corner on a decaying old rebel base what’s left of the Resistance has stolen away too. They’re both surrounded by people , Kylo quirks an eyebrow, sensing his mother near but Rey is quick to shut him out. The second time Rey appears to Kylo as he is studying star charts trying to find her. That meeting doesn’t last long because both of them try to figure out what the other knows and have their guards up high enough to terminate the connection quickly. The third time Rey is standing in the rain outside the base and remembers the first time she had felt it on her skin and thinks of Kylo because he was there. She’s not quite sure if it’s her fault they’re meeting again, because she thought of him, like some hidden part of herself somehow longed to see him . He stalks toward her, silent as a grave but eventually opens his mouth to speak.

Kylo is tempted to choke Hux with his bare hands as he barges in on that moment and Rey disappears from where she stood.

“Any news on the location of the rebels?” He asks the ginger without pause or patience.

“No, Supreme Leader,” Hux answers and Kylo’s patience is wearing thin.

“I want them eradicated,” he says but the anger and hatred he taps into feels stale. “Find them.”

Hux hurries assurances, unaware that his contempt at Kylo seeps out of his every pore. The ginger believes he’s building himself up into Kylo’s right hand the way he had once wanted to be Snoke’s but Kylo is well aware that Hux is not to be trusted and secretly already plots how to get rid of him.

When the time comes, Kylo thinks, Hux will be the one to perish. Once his thoughts of mutiny grow into more than a nuisance. For now, it’s merely somewhat amusing that Hux thinks there is any way for him to best Kylo, that pathetic imbecile.

Kylo retires to his chambers soon after, pleased to have traded his spartan dwellings on the Supremacy for his larger ones on the Finalizer. Sleep never comes easy to him but it’s less strenuous now that he actually has room for his long limbs on his bed. He thinks of Rey for hours before he turns around to find her lying beside him.

 

Rey, at the other side of the galaxy, has gone to bed not expecting at all to see Ben Solo for the fourth time in as many days, least of all lying in bed next to her when she is startled awake in the middle of the night. She gasps and scurries away, toward the edge of her bed. The wretched creature is wearing no shirt again, his broad frame giant and pale, like sculpted marble so very out of place on her sheets in the dark. Her breathing staggers with the intimacy of that image and he knows and makes no move to cover himself, as he does. Like every time, instead of saying anything, he just studies her, propped up on his elbow almost leisurely, like she’s a past-time puzzle he can’t solve, like he could drag out her soul from the sockets of her eyes and unravel her until her whole being had dissolved into his as if that was nothing.

“This has got to stop,” she finally says.

“Where are you hiding?” He asks in turn.

“I’m not telling you that.” Not that he should be surprised by this in the slightest.

“Then face me,” he leans forward and Rey only notes the strange absence of a reflex to retreat. She’s not scared of him, not naked as he is. But then again, maybe she should be.

“I will, before long,” she says because that’s hardly a mystery. This is their fight now, the light and the darkness, Rey and Ben balancing the two tips of the scale until one of them falls. Until one of them kills the other.

“I don’t want to kill you,” Ben says, following her train of thought. “I want you to reconsider.”

“I will not join you,” she says. “I don’t want to rule the galaxy, I have no interest in being a tyrant.”

“Neither have I,” he says and sits up slightly, sounding borderline offended. “Creating order is not the same as tyranny.”

“Ben,” she huffs exasperatedly. He looks at her like he did the first time she used his real name, slightly baffled, a little bit scared and something else she can’t quite name. Good. She refuses to grant him the mantle of Kylo Ren he is not willing to let go off. He isn’t too happy with it but he lets it slide.

He shifts on the bed and Rey can almost feel the air from his movement brushing her lightly, even if that’s impassible since he’s not really there. Still, if she would reach out, she could touch him and they’d both feel it, she knows this. And she swears she can smell his scent, musk and sandalwood, residue leather and soap. It’s distracting in its pleasantness.

He reaches out a hand, to touch her face, she gathers from his trajectory.

“Don’t,” she pleads and he stops the movement in mid-air.

 

“Why,” Kylo asks although he’s really not all the way sure why he’s moving in to tuck her hair back behind her ears in the first place. It was an instinct, an impulse–things he isn’t used to questioning. Then he understands. “You’re afraid of what you’ll see. Of what it means, what it feels like. Admit it.”

Kylo remembers sharply what he saw when he touched his fingers to hers when she visited him days ago on the Supremacy, back when everything had been different. That vision had been everything because it meant the end of his loneliness. And yet, it had only been a fractured, jumbled mess of moments he witnessed, a pinch in time: Rey’s hand in his, her standing with him, smiling, flickers of joy and something else, something raw, something that makes his cheeks burn despite all his might and power. She’s seen it too, she’s _felt_ it too. He says her name and her eyes snap to his. He touches her cheek and she gasps. But there is no vision, no images flashing. Only his skin on hers and her heartbeat underneath his fingertips. Then the connection breaks and Kylo is left alone in his bed.

The next time she happens upon him there, it’s two nights later and he isn’t aware of it, not for a long time.

 

Rey at her desk in her quarters, thinks about the last time Ben had appeared to her earlier in the day while she tucks her hair free of the bands that held it together for the day. Him and her had shared some senseless bickering about the same old things; right and wrong and light and dark that only went in circles and once again, her remembering him, gets him right to her, right back into her bed–only this time he has his eyes closed and doesn’t seem to know she’s there at all. She almost says something when he makes a sound, a strangled, laboured breath and she knows instantly that she should not be seeing this.

Still she is transfixed, mesmerised what is unfolding in front of her. One hand lies on the pillow beside his head, grabbing at the fabric, while the other is under the sheet tucked to his waist and...moves there, rhythmically and staggeringly and Rey knows what he’s doing. She knows because she’s done this, quite often really on endless, lonely nights on Jakku. She’d just always thought she was the only one, she never realised this was a thing that people other than her did, that _he_ did. She supposes it’s not that bad, maybe it helps him. True, it seems too private for her to be watching, even if that’s not enough to make her stop. It feels nice what he’s doing, she can tell from his face and knows from experience. His features look soft and pained at the same time, but a different pain than she’s used to on his features, it makes her mouth go dry and her fingers ache to reach out. His muscles tighten in his chest and arms and he hums lowly, almost a growl. Like a jolt, the sound carries and pierces straight through Rey’s body and she replies, half automatically with a sharp gasp as her ears and groin flare up hot and longing.

Ben’s eyes fly open and he freezes, seeing her standing in front of the bed watching him. He doesn’t move though, he just stares at her. Until he apparently decides that she isn’t going anywhere and he makes a grab for his blanket with his free hand and then tosses it away. Rey doesn’t breathe and not looking isn’t even in the realm of possibilities.

He lies completely bare fore her, a toned, large body, naked from head to toe with his hand, that hand she had touched not so long ago, wrapped around his firm manhood, perfectly still. She can’t help but stare–it’s the first time she’s seen a naked man in reality after all. It takes a shameful while until she looks at his face again. Ben himself has been waiting for her to do so and now looks hungry, dazed, alert and puzzled all at once.

He groans and starts moving his hand again, keeping her eyes locked in place, watching her watch him take his pleasure.

“You’re not looking at me like you did in the forest now,” he says, staccato and laboured. “Am I not a monster to you like this?”

“No,” she whispers and watches. She’s burning up, she half wishes she could scratch that itch he’s making her feel too.

“If you tell me to stop, I’ll stop.” He says, only going at himself more furiously.

“No,” she says again, without thinking.

“Do you hate me?” He asks.

“You’re just lost,” she says.

“Say it,” he orders. “Say what you said in the elevator.”

Rey rakes her brain to remember, to comply, because it seems like he is racing toward a peak and he needs her reply, wants her words to get him to the climactic point of his efforts. Despite herself, she wants nothing more than to help him with that. Yes, _help_.

“I’ll help you,” she says, careful to match the tone and intimacy from what feels lifetimes ago on the Supremacy and Ben growls and goes rigid before bucking up with his face contorting into a brief spasm of sweet strain and he spends himself on his stomach.

He is panting when he disappears, leaving Rey breathless and hungry herself. He doesn’t materialise again to watch her follow his lead where he lay on her bed but she thinks maybe he can feel it in his sleep.

 

The next morning, once Rey has returned from an early run with Finn, it’s the first time she feels Ben actively tugging on their bond. It’s a strange feeling, not as immediate as the roaring pressure in her ear when he pops up somewhere suddenly but more pronounced, like a pull at her sleeve. He’s knocking, for the lack of better word. She remembers the night hotly and somewhat shamefully and isn’t sure she wants to allow him in.

“Please,” it echoes through her head faintly. His voice. This is new as well.

“Fine,” she says out loud into the silence of her quarters and the roaring begins. Moments later, Ben is there in the room with her, looking tired.

“Are you alright?” She asks him and is momentarily shocked by her own concern for him. His twitching eyebrow tells her he is too.

“Let’s say the First Order isn’t too welcoming of new leadership,” he answers.

“Didn’t you mean to destroy them?” She says, even though that may be embarking into dangerous territory. His feelings about that day, about when she turned his proposal to join him down, still burn red hot in the back of his mind.

“Why destroy something when you can change it,” he says.

“I see.” She understands. “That’s what you have planned for me. That’s not going to work. I’m not going to change.”

Ben takes a step forward and Rey stands her ground. For a second she thinks that she should better run. But she never does.

 

Looking at her unmoving, Kylo feels the exhilaration of the night before creep back into his system and flood it with hope and something darker; desire he had never known he possessed. Human, common, _base_ desire for Rey, not only as a companion in the Force but as a woman. She had not recoiled from him the night before, when he had humbled himself in front of her, had not called him sick, dirty or perverted. On the contrary, she had watched him with a mix of intrigue and arousal and he had seen her writhe under her own touch in his dreams, his face split in pleasure in her head. He can’t say he’s overly surprised. He replays the moment when she first barged in on him while he was getting dressed, telling him that she would rather not be seeing him then. Funny, when he had not asked for her there either. She had then turned around and asked him about Han but when she saw him in that state of undress, her words had turned to breath and her eyes had fallen on his bare chest in both curiosity and embarrassment. There’d been desire there, the same she’d felt yesterday. Kylo wonders if that came along with their bond or if that would still remain even if they weren’t tethered across worlds and light years.

“I _will_ change you,” he promises darkly and gets even closer as her eyes follow him until he is only inches away, towering there above her slender frame.

“What if I change you first?” She challenges and he can’t stop from shaking, just a little bit. He has come here to seduce her, there is no denying that–but he is not above admitting that were she to try and seduce him, he would fall to her feet in a heartbeat.

“Have you ever kissed someone?” He asks, glancing down at her lips. “Properly?”

Rey swallows her bottom lip and thusly keeps it from his scrutiny. It makes no matter, her teeth biting down on it as she stares at him make up for the loss.

“You haven’t,” he states, because he knows.

Not that Kylo has significantly more experience...but there had been girls, two or three, from the village near Luke’s temple. Those were forbidden, stolen kisses in twilight, more for the sake of it than the connection. He would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about kissing Rey since she called him Ben for the first time and came close to him in that elevator, he would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought of her touching him...and not just his fingertips or his thigh, rolling over his back to fight Snoke’s guards.

“You’re presuming I’ll let you kiss me,” Rey says, her defiance weakened by the raspiness of her voice and her flickering glances at his lips in turn.

“Will you stop me?” He asks and dips down. She doesn’t flinch. “Say it then, say you don’t want it.”

Rey remains silent and tilts her chin up. So now, they’re both lost.

 

He kisses her with all the restraint he can manage and Rey hardly puckers her lips at first, hardly kisses him back. That is until she does, pressing her mouth on his and pushing into him, tiny hands coming to rest on his chest. To direct her force, Kylo brings one hand around the back of her head and guides her movements. She’s more than willing to learn, following him, when he pries her lips loose. Tasting him curiously, when he swipes his tongue across hers. Truthfully, it’s hard to keep track of just how she reacts to him because of the way he reacts to her. It feels like he’s never truly been alive before, touching her, kissing her feels like a fire is raging through his body, setting him alight. He wants her so much he could cry and the thought of having to let her go again eventually is killing him. He peeks into her head while he still has some capacity to and finds his own want echoed in her, his name resounding in her mind. His real name.

 _Ben_ . He never much cared for it until she said it. He would love to hear her scream it, he thinks but even with his experience, he wouldn’t know how to go about doing that. And if anything, that is not the plan. Because he has one. He _will_ change her mind. He will make her stand with him, choose him, join him. Because if she feels for him even a fragment of what he feels for her (and with the insights this bond of theirs allows him, he has a pretty good idea that she does), she is already half in love with him and won’t that make her stay with him? Surely it has to.

Reluctantly, he finally untangles himself from her, hoping that, for the intended effect, he can leave her now the way he has found her this time, on purpose.

“Rey,” he says and is mildly surprised at the cracks in his own voice, “I can give you whatever you want, it’s all yours. All you need to do is ask.”

And then he takes a step back and glances down at her, trying to sound self-confident and hopes she isn’t too tuned into his underlying feelings right now to find he really isn’t: “There’s another way we can join together that nobody ever needs to now about. Come to me, when you’re ready.”

And then, for some wonderful alignment of the stars, one thing in Ben Solo’s life works out for once, and he makes Rey disappear from his chambers.

 

Rey is left with all the air knocked out of her and her body tingling all over. So he wants to bind her to his side with kisses and...that other thing she already saw them do in a fragment of that vision when they touched in Luke’s hut. Good plan. Especially when she repurposes it for her own means. Two can play that game, she thinks. If Kylo Ren wants to take her to bed to make her his empress, she might as well take him to bed to make him Ben Solo again.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> ...there will be dirty things in the next chapter. Okay, I know this will never happen in 9 but i need to get the filth out of my system before I can write an actual multi-chapter fic set after 8!
> 
> Always so so happy about comments and kudos!


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